Not cool Was getting ready to leave Mega-Lo-Mart last night and had to take my returns to Customer Service. When I walk in there's an older guy standing there and he asked me, "Do you know me, know who I am?" I looked at him for a second and said, "No, I don't believe I know you." "What's your name?" He asks me....while looking right at my name tag...(there's that literacy thing again) "My name is Loretta." I proceed toward the back with my cart and I hear him say, "Have I been with you?" "No...you'd fucking remember that," I said and walked off. It's one thing to flirt y'all....but asking someone if you've ever fucked them in front of loads of people isn't flirting....it's begging to get your ass kicked. Don't do that.
This morning while me and my dogs were enjoying a plate of sausage and eggs there's a knock at the door. Dogs go ape. I have a Boxer and a Pitbull. Both are huge. Both are intact. Both love the hell outta mama. And if they sense any anxiety/danger from me they go into instant ass eating mode. If I was the person with bad intentions on wrong side of butthe othingdoor ass and elbows getting as far away from those huge, very fucking serious guard dogs, in the shortest amount of time humanly possible. Fuck, I'd prolly set the ground on fire hauling ass. But, meth is a hell of a drug, as they do say...where apparently you're afraid of imaginary people stealing from you but not scared of hella serious REAL guard dogs fixing to eat your ass. Go figure...right? Since the dogs didn't alert to a car puling up I knew it had to be the Tweakerzoids from up the road,who always appear like a bad omen out of nowhere and claim that someone is using my property to access the...
Y'all....I just had a Fred Sanford heart attack moment. My BF of 8 years walked in the house and handed me $40 in cash and said "go get what you need and put some gas in your car." TF? I thought I was hallucinating y'all cause in 8 years he's never once given me a penny for anything.. I grabbed my chest and hollered "Elizabeth I'm coming"🤣 Thank he wants a bj.. but them's $fiddy Ok I'm done 🤣🤣🤣
Comments
Post a Comment